Behind the Title....

"Wow, you've got your hands full, don't you?" - I really, truly cannot even begin to count how many times I've heard that from strangers. It's one thing coming from family or friends who know that you really do have your hands full and are sympathizing with you, but I don't know what it is about strangers saying that to me that drives me bonkers!

Don't get me wrong, I know that most people don't mean anything by it and are merely making an observation and trying to make casual conversation. BUT, why can't you say "Oh, how cute!" or "Wow, how blessed are you?" or even "Boy, you sure are busy but how lucky are you?". Those are just a couple of more positive comments I can think of off the top of my head.

When people make rude comments, and trust me, I've heard it all, I often think of the Duggars with 19 children. Or I think of the people (and they are out there even if you think I'm being heartless) who play the system and literally time when they have a kid to stay on government funds. For goodness sake people, I only have THREE kids, THREE! And I love them, take care of them and support them. Arielle was not planned at all, "oopsies" do happen, and what a wonderful surprise she was :) It's preposterous to me how now a days having three kids is worthy of long stares, or dirty looks when they act like kids.

Let me just tell you the things I've heard. I will never forget one day that I had to go to Target to get medicine and Jake was at work. I loaded up the boys in the cart and put Arielle in the baby carrier. As I was walking through the parking lot, an older gentleman was leaning against his car smoking a cigarette and yelled out "Boy! That's a lot of kids. Here comes the circus!" Yeah, that's right buddy, stare at the freak show going by while you suck on your death stick. God forbid I actually had serious problems going on and you just added to it with that lovely comment! Or the time my sister, who also has three kids, was at Costco and an older gentleman walked up to her and said (no joke!) "Can't you F&$*ing control yourself?". Let's not even comment on that one....

We get stares everywhere we go, even when I am with Jake. Imagine the stares I get alone. That is why I stay home when he is at work. I avoid the public as much as possible. Why? Because people don't think before they speak.

As my pastor has said recently, "You never truly know someone until you know their story." So before you judge that frumpy Mom with three kids in her cart, that homeless person begging for money on the street, or that grumpy person in line at the grocery store, stop and think. What might they being going through? You have no idea until you know their story.

So yes, my hands are full, but so is my heart.